A24 Producing Latest Film from Beanie-Wearing Data Center
The 2-year-old data center is the youngest filmmaker of all time.
From a bush outside of an A24 HQ, I can now confirm that the production company behind Backrooms is now producing the latest film from AI film savant, Beanie-wearing Data Center.
“We’re excited to see what the Beanie-wearing Data Center throws together,” said A24 co-founder and CEO, Daniel Katz in a press conference earlier this morning. “Beanie wearing filmmakers have never led us astray, so it’s safe to assume we’re in good hands with this data center. I mean look at it. It’s wearing the shit out of that beanie.”
A24 leadership is promising fans that this latest deal in no way would change the company’s commitment to providing a platform for visionary filmmakers to tell bold, original stories that challenge the status quo and resonate deeply with diverse audiences.
“We still want to provide a platform for visionary filmmakers, we just don’t want to provide money,” said co-founder David Fenkel, before stepping aside to order an assistant to deliver a copy of every A24 produced film to the data center. “If we pay filmmakers, we can’t pay the tech company to run Beanie-wearing Data Center. If we don’t pay the tech company, they can’t continue to find ways to revolutionize how we make money as a production company.”
We caught up with an A24 fan in their home to see how they felt about the news.
“Hhhrrrğğğğhh. Hhhrrrğğğğğğhh. Hhhrğğğhh,” said A24 superfan, George Phillips, before we shook him awake. “Whoa, sorry. I must have fallen asleep during It Comes at Night. Good movie. Ah, yeah, this deal sucks. There are plenty of beanie wearing human filmmakers they could be backing. Guess I’ll just have to back Neon now. Let me just Google what movies they’ve made before I commit to them.”
At press time, Beanie-wearing Data Center pitched A24, a slow burn horror film, featuring a broken family. The bush I hid in for this scoop was a Midsommar Juniper.
Full method.