'Michael' Review: Fun for the Whole Family and That Grunting Man at the Back
The way it makes him feel.
From a bush outside of the Alamo Drafthouse where I just saw a screening of Michael, I can confirm that the film is a wonderful time at the movies for the entire family, as well as the man at the back of the theater making grunting noises.
A biography about the ‘King of Pop,’ Michael Jackson (a.k.a. the ‘King of Not Diddling Kids,’) this film gives an in depth look at the life and career of the most famous man to ever live. It allows us to look at Michael Jackson the man as he rises through superstardom, changes the pop star game, and definitely doesn’t diddle any kids. Not a single point in this movie does he diddle any kids. On the contrary, he is a friend to the kids. If he had diddled kids, it would have been in this film since it’s a biography. That’s how biographies work.
No diddling kids here. That’s what makes this such a great film to take your family to. It’s a feel good picture. But not in that way. Emotionally. It leaves you warm and fuzzy on the inside as Michael is able to use his talent to bring joy to the world through his music and incredible dance moves. Parents will love the songs and kids will love the protagonist. Michael is a friend to all children because he saw himself in them, not in that way though, and so kids in the audience will respond by seeing themselves in him. But not like that.
But the film isn’t just for the parents and kids in the theater, it’s also a great time for the most important moviegoer of all, that strange man in the back of the theater who stared at my kids the whole time and kept making increasingly louder and more violent grunting noises. He had a great time by the sound of it. He was reacting to the whole movie. For all the big moments he was a beacon of joy. From the sequence detailing the making of Thriller, to Michael inventing the moonwalk, and even all the scenes where the pop star didn’t diddle any kids, this guy was having a hoot. The film gave him immense pleasure. He even had his own Michael Jackson white glove.
This is a must see movie. Whether you’re a fan of Michael Jackson, parents who want to introduce their kids to famous non-diddlers, or just a childless middle aged man who wants to stare at other people’s children in a dark room while listening to “The Way You Make Me Feel”. Michael is the movie for you. The bush I hid in for this review was a Common Hibiscus.
