Netflix Locks “Skip Intro” Button Behind Highest Priced Tier
You will watch the intro and you will like it.
From a bush outside of Netflix HQ, I can now confirm that Netflix is locking the “Skip Intro” button behind the higher paywall. The fan favorite button has been a staple since the beginning of streaming, but Netflix co-CEO, Ted Sarandos, says fans have taken it for granted for way too long.
“I don’t know if you guys know this, but making movies and shows is expensive,” Sarandos said to members of the press from the upper deck of his super yacht. “We’ve got to pay a lot of people and that’s hard to do when there aren’t enough subscribers at our highest tier. That’s why I am happy to announce that we’re locking the “Skip intro” button behind our Premium level at just $26.99*, adding even more value to an already great deal.”
Sarandos isn’t stopping there.
“Fast forward and rewind are also becoming exclusive features to the Premium subscription level,” Sarandos said while using hundred-dollar bills to light a bonfire on his yacht. “The poors at the lower-tier subscriptions will still be able to enjoy their Netflix shows all the same, but now they’ll have to get through a run of the show before they’re able to return to their favorite parts.”
Netflix subscribers are not too happy and are taking to social media to voice their anger.
“Greedy ass Netflix strikes again,” wrote George Franks on Bluesky. “I never used the skip intro button. I mean come on, who is going to skip the Parks & Rec intro? But it was always nice to have the option. This is bullshit. I’m cancelling my subscription and hitting Pirates Bay.”
At press time, Netflix also announced a new program that would shut off the app if it detected more than one person in the room. The bush I hid in for this piece was a Price Increase Juniper.
*Price is subject to change and probably already has by the time you are reading this.
He is so back!