Dad Rewatching ‘Mad Men’ Yearns for the Days When it was Easier to Abandon Family
“A guy could just get up and go.”
Editor’s Note: This scoop originally appeared on The Hollywood Time$ Substack on December 19, 2025
From the bushes outside of my neighbor’s home, I can now confirm that local man George Clemons is rewatching Mad Men on HBOMax and feeling nostalgic for a time where men could easily abandon their families in the suburbs.
“Wow, we really had it all back then didn’t we,” Clemons said to himself, ignoring his son’s request to play a board game together, as a family. “Don is so cool. He’s a free man. No one to answer to or support. He just gets to drink and drive around wherever he wants. Doesn’t have to worry about going to snot-nosed Bobby’s baseball games or whatever.”
Clemon’s Mad Men binge continued through the week, as the suburban accountant daydreamed about abandoning his family.
“Don just runs off to the other side of the country whenever he wants. I should do that,” Clemons said alone on the couch as the rest of his family laughed together at the nearby kitchen table, over a game of Catan. “And they all get to just drink openly whenever they want. I have to hide my booze at the office and sneak a ship. Man. We really had it all and did nothing with it.”
Around season 5 of Clemons’ Mad Men binge, the rest of the Clemons family exited their home and loaded suitcases and pillows into their family car. Sara Clemons was calling it quits.
“If he wants to leave us so badly, we’ll do him a favor and leave him alone instead,” Sara said calmly, loading up her life into the back of her Honda Odyssey. “We stuck with him through his Breaking Bad phase even though it landed him on a list at our pharmacy. We entertained his hacker phase during the Mr. Robot binge, but this is it. I can’t take this man seriously anymore. Just watch the show and enjoy it like a normal human being. I can’t believe I used to love this man.”
At press time George Clemons had finished Mad Men and started binging The Wire. The bush I hid in for this story was a Scotch Willow.
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