AMC Offering Overnight Sleepover Screenings For ‘Michael’ For Males Aged 12 And Under
Bubbles not included.
From a bush in Leawood, I can now confirm that AMC has announced special screenings for the highly anticipated new musical biopic Michael. In an effort to honor the King of Pop and give fans the true Michael Jackson experience, AMC is offering special overnight sleepover screenings exclusively for males under the age of 12.
“The film is not only just a celebration of the music,” said AMC CEO Adam Aron. “It’s a celebration of a man. We wondered, “how would Michael Jackson want to watch this movie if he were alive,” and we all arrived at the same conclusion: with dozens of young adolescents away from their parents in a dark room. We will be requiring proof of age before allowing people inside. We do not want pesky teenagers disrupting this screening.”
John Branca, who partially controls the Michael Jackson estate and who is depicted by Miles Teller in the film, is excited about this unique theatrical experience.
“Michael always had a sense of childlike wonder,” said Branca. “And just like a young young child, Michael was pure and never did anything wrong. This also made him quite easy to exploit. We hope that these sleepover screenings will give the young audience an authentic Michael Jackson experience. Parents will be allowed in the theater, but they’ll be held in a separate room and asked to sign various legal documents, and they will not be allowed to accompany their children to the movie, and they will be legally barred from asking their sons what went on during that screening.”
Michael Jackson superfan Catherine Janokowski is excited for the complete Michael Jackson fan experience.
“My little son David has loved listening to Michael Jackson from a young age, mostly since it’s all I listen to in the car,” said Janokowski. “I normally don’t let him do sleepovers. People are crazy these days. But a controlled environment such as this, under the watchful eye of a legal army and a music megastar’s opaque estate sounds like a wonderful way for him to watch Michael Jackson do some neat dance and music tricks in the dark. I am excited to watch the film away from my son and ignore the questions he asks about sex in the future.”
At press time multiple moviegoers reported seeing the ghost of Michael Jackson in a matinee showing of The Super Mario Galaxy Movie. The bush I hid in for this scoop was a Red Jacket Juniper.
